Monday, March 17, 2008

winning

i was in a competition. we were all in teams, and right at the moment we were all in a rollercoaster type sled, made of tiny slats of wood that would bend and flex into the size of space they were in. it was like a bobsled or a rollercoaster, and each team was near each other in a long line of sled pieces all made of this flexible wooden construction. we went through tunnels and over rapids. i was in the first "car" with this little girl that was my partner.

we made it through the rapids, and then the tunnel we were heading down closed into a really tight space where i had to fold in half at the waist to fit through. i pushed her to the side and behind me so we could make it through.

at the end all the teams were confronted by what our scores were. i didnt make the cut for the final two. i always made the cut. this was the first year i hadn't and i was really disappointed, and it completely sucked, but i couldnt figure out why i hadn't had a good enough score even on the trivia part to advance our team. anyway, this was bulshit, and i got out of there as soon as i could. balls.

Friday, March 7, 2008

camp

this year at camp there were no buildings. everything was outside. there was a partial shell of what was once the dining hall, two walls and a roof. painted red. the wall near the lake was just the structure at 8'o/c all the way to the corner where it got more complex, and expanded to house a garage, with a few little windows with centerfolds taped up on the inside.

we all gathered at a long long picnic table in the center of the space. we were sitting at the lake side, and before th meal started i tried to tell about a dream i had - it was about thinking thoughts, and how all the bits of information got stored in different places in my brain. when i recalled them my brain knew how to gather all these pieces from each of their places simultaneously for seamless and immediate recollection - i had discovered something else about the process and was about to share it with the group, but george had been mimicking me just to my left. it was the really annoying fifth grade sort of repeating everything i say-game, so we moved to the other end of the table.

it was in the sun, and closer to the rest of the campus which was just a huge field these days. no rec hall or craft hall. "we can do everything outside" someone reminded us. at least there were still cabins.

i didnt know which one was mine to go sleep in, and carrying around my bedroll had become cumbersome. i just wanted to settle. 'tell me where to go' i kept thinking. i'm glad i didnt bring my good comforter because it kept getting caught on nails sticking out of everywhere and tearing.

at least all my friends are here. and i'm sure i will find a place to sleep soon. at that time, i will relax and take in the summer air, and its going to be amazing!

Thursday, March 6, 2008

winter vacation

i had to get where i was going, so taking a ride in this guys truck seemed like a good idea. it was freezing outside, and the 6 or so other unhappy looking people inside the cab didnt seem to care that we were in the bed or the truck with the wintery wind chilling us. i pulled a bunch of the blankets on top of me, and realized that they all were vintage cloth signs and maps from an antique store in the area. he didnt seem to care.

eventually we got to the lodge. it was small, but was already packed with people. every time i came inside i seemed to misplace my boots. all three pairs, the big tall black ones, the brown cowboy boots and the red ones that i never wear.

i ended up eating a little something with a man of some sort of gonzo persuasion, and soon we realized we had stumbled into hell. this was unfortunate. it was still really cold. we grabbed hands and waited it out.

i got a ride back with him instead of the creepster with the truck, which was probably for the best.

arriving at home i was exhausted. i collapsed in my room near the window. my roommates girlfriends were in there chatting and although i could whisper to them when i floated in and out of dreams, my voice didnt have enough strength behind it to call out to the livingroom where it seemed the boys were having people over.

after a nap i focused myself and went out to see the commotion. a bunch of the guys were drinking growlers of beer on the shag carpeted floor. one of them gave me his glass. it is a small world, and my best friends from college were hanging out with my other friends' brother, and a guy i knew in highschool. awkward.